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.of HOPE. INSPIRATION. DREAMS. and the COURAGE to ACT on them.

'Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving." - Albert Einstein

Thursday 9 October 2014

Lose your FACE!

It's difficult to see the picture when you're in the frame.

It's also easier to be honest with someone other than yourself. Especially so when you confuse yourself with all the things you think you should be with who you are, what you should be feeling with what you are feeling, what people expect of you versus what you expect of yourself, what you're good at versus what actually livens you. I suppose the reason why knowing yourself is the toughest thing to do is that you exist more in your head than in real life.

After a very honest, profound and inspiring conversation with Willem today, I had some important realisations:

- I'm often in my own way. I don't ask for help when I need it the most. I want to help other people, but the only way I can help other people is by helping myself first. He demonstrated how simple it is to ask, and you don't lose anything from it. If I'm not happy, inspired, energised, alive...how am I supposed to positively impact another person's life? The only person I can change is myself. I am responsible for the energy I bring. Neither can I help someone else, if I'm broke, or floundering for a lifeline.

- I'm a bit of a masochist. It's an odd thing to say...but some way some how...I usually find my way back to things that do not bring me any joy...for "practical reasons". I beat myself up about things that distract me from what I'm supposed to be doing. Its a bitter pill to swallow when you discover what you've worked nearly your whole life for does not bring you any bit of joy. On the other hand, it is liberating when you realise that, and you let it go. When you've killed the option of going back to your old unhappy ways, you're forced to go into unknown territory. Better the quest than the safe sad little wheel, right? "You cannot solve your new problems with your old ways," he said.

- I'm very much attached to the image of always doing the right thing, saying the right thing, being socially acceptable. After all, I belong to a profession that prides itself in quality and correctness. I also hate "losing face". Its a term in Asian culture, losing face is the equivalent to being embarrassed, and having no place to hide your face. I know that having people see an unformed substance has always been uncomfortable feeling for me. I always have to "have it together". I've subsequently been drowning in the thoughts of finding my purpose, and doing the "right" thing that I've paralysed myself. For fear of doing the wrong thing, I haven't embraced the fun part of just doing and discovering.

I'm still young. I don't know it all. I'm okay with failing as long as I'm having fun.

So I'm done with thinking about stuff now. I'm ready to do and sell some sh*t.

Lose my mind. Lose my face!

I start with my homework, and I commit to inasmuch as possible to do things that are not harmful to my own esteem.

Thank you Mr Gous for meeting me today :). Looking forward to working with you in the future. 

Saturday 4 October 2014

True Beauty

Some say life is a battle field - it's just a fight after another fight. If you show you are weak, the strong will tear you down. If you show an act of kindness, the fierce will swallow you whole. You fight your way to get ahead. You keep your armour on to protect yourself and your identity.

Fortunately, we no longer live in the age where we physically need to fight each other for survival (for the most part). Even though the physical armour has been removed, we've put on a more powerful shield. This shield is our false self, a detached self that no one can harm, a self which is efficient at work and gets things done, a self when criticized does not care, a self who hides its own weaknesses and feigns perfection.

Strength. Beauty. Perfection. Truth.

Can all four co-exist?

Let's start with the last one: Truth. What is truth? Simply, truth is something that is real - fact - whatever is true. When someone speaks the truth, it is when they are honest with others, moreover, honest with themselves. Sometimes, it's easier to be honest with another person than it is to be honest with yourself. Savage Garden once sang: "animals and children tell the truth; they never lie". I think the reason that they can do so, is that they don't have much to prove and they don't have a story they need to cling onto. Truth is as important as the person with whom its shared. You don't share your life story with any person - especially people who have not earned the rights to hear your story (Brene Brown).

Perfectionism. The biggest untruth. We are often told that no one is perfect, and yet people get judged harshly. Or, the other extreme: no one is perfect, and people justify their faults to the nth degree. "So what if I have a bad temper? I was born this way!"  The problem with being a perfectionist, is that there is little to no room for error or fault - in other words, no room for improvement. There is also a sense of lack of awareness, distrust, and lack in self confidence. When you are a perfectionist, the word in itself, starts to blind you from your own faults, because you are "perfect". All the faults lie with the OTHER person. When you are a perfectionist, there's also a degree of distrust in the other person. You are unwilling, and not comfortable enough to let the other person see your faults. The fear of judgement gnaws at your own self-awareness and your own confidence.

If we all were perfect, I wonder what the world would be like to live in. The funny thing about beauty is that it does not necessarily lie in perfection. Dimples, for example, is considered a characteristic of a beautiful person, but it is actually a genetic defect that is caused by shortened facial muscles*.

Beauty has also been said to be in the eye of the beholder. As an Enlightened Warrior, you learn that everything anyone says or sees, is a projection of themselves. If the beholder can appreciate beauty, it means that beauty exists in them, as well as the object of their observation. John Legend sings about his love and her "perfect imperfection". It's such a touching line. When you truly love someone, you are willing to embrace all of them - their strengths and their weaknesses. It almost goes to say, that when you're willing to accept someone else's flaws, you can then begin to be merciful to yourself, and accept your own shortcomings.

Strength. Self acceptance and self approval is an understated strength. When you can wholly accept yourself, it would make it so much easier to be kinder to yourself. Self confidence comes from self approval. A person's strength lies not in using their own strengths to attack another person's weaknesses. A person's true strength lies in his or her ability to use their strengths and also inspire another to draw on their strengths and be a better person.

Our false self although in the short term can assist in getting things done, in the long term it cannot serve us. In the long term, as we carry the weight of our other, projected self, we project a wall, where others cannot enter and we cannot exit. We can no longer connect with others on a deeper level, and more so, ourselves. That is the pain of our false self - disconnection and division. The illusion of perfection.

When you are willing to accept truth about your weaknesses, you are willing to forgo the impression of perfection, but strive to be a better person in spite of your faults; when you are willing to see the beauty in your imperfections, you will find strength in the truth of your soul. Peace and love are waiting to enter your heart.

Wednesday 24 September 2014

Being Vulnerable

I watched a TED talk yesterday which showed Brene Brown speaking about the  power of vulnerability. WOW!!! I subsequently watched more of her in other interviews.

I came away with this:

As a society we have lost our ability to deeply feel. We live in so much more abundance than we ever did before, but so many of us have a scarcity mindset - a feeling of not being good enough. 

Subsequently, when we face feelings of pain, depression, anxiety, vulnerability, we numb it - we hide from what we're truly are thinking and feeling. We numb them with medication, drugs, alcohol, being busy, distracting ourselves with TV, social media, we comfort eat, we go and do some retail therapy...When we numb ourselves of the undesired emotions, we also decrease our capacity of experiencing the amazing emotions of joy, happiness, and love. 

Why do we numb our pain, I thought? 

Perhaps we don't know how to deal with it and making it go away is just easier. We don't have the time, because we have pressing matters to deal with. We hide our true feelings for the fear of appearing weak or being judged. We check our true selves at the door, and we wonder how we got to the place when we feel like we are no longer at ease with ourselves, we don't know who we are anymore. We then seek a greater purpose and meaning. We search for ourselves.

In a way when we're vulnerable we're being honest. Brene says that vulnerability is the birthplace of creativity and a lot of other amazing things.

My favourite quote: "Being vulnerable is not the same as being weak." But you need to be audience appropriate when you share. "Share your story with someone who has earned the rights to hear your story!"


If you would like to watch Brene Brown's TED TALK:

Oprah's interview:

Chase Jarvis's interview:

Books to read: by Brene Brown
The Gifts of Imperfection
Daring Greatly





Sunday 7 September 2014

Reflections of 10 year old matriculant

So it was our 10 year high school reunion this weekend.

Was it really something worth going to? I wondered to myself, as I was packing my bags. I didn't enjoy high school, and I haven't kept in touch with majority of the people I matriculated with. All I remember was just waiting to get out! It was going to be awkward...and the fact that less than 13% of our group RSVP'd was not encouraging. I wondered if the other people were feeling what I was feeling. I wondered if I was going to make new friends...*aherm* I told myself that I must keep an open mind. WTF!? Donna...Why on earth did you RSVP!!!!

Then my Trustee said to me: "It's because you love people, Donna."

Really?

Anyways, I rocked up, and it turned out to be quite cool despite the turnout.

Surprisingly, I had a few takeaways from the reunion:

- They say that time changes people. I discovered that people only become more of who they really are over time. They are just more confident in themselves. There will always be the people you connect with, and those you don't and that's fine.

- I gained perspective. I thought I missed out on some friendships because I was not assertive enough - or social enough because I felt I had to be studying the whole time to get straight A's...but I realised that the people that I was friends with, were all the friends I needed.

- I have always put wayyy too much pressure on myself, one example is deciding on my destination. 10 years ago, it was becoming a doctor or CA. Now I'm a CA...and it's been eating away at me as to where my next destination is going to be, and it has cost me some sanity and some time. One of the guys said to me on Saturday: "Sometimes you don't need to know where the destination is, just enjoy the journey. It's more exciting that way." Thank you. And yes, you will meet more people on the way, who will add to who you are.

- Most importantly, I realised how much I've grown. This reunion was more about me than it was about the people I went to school with. People will come and go at various stages of your life, the only consistent person in your life is you (and your family).  Are you happy with who you've turned out to be?

All in all, realized that I missed being around people. My trustee is right. I love people. Even though I haven't felt very good about myself lately with the lack of progress, I love people. I love being around people. I love it when people speak their truths.  I love connecting. Oh, I miss it. Each person brings out something different out of you, and you're always learning about yourself when you are with others.

'Nuffffff of being a hermit! Go forth and mingle!

Saturday 2 August 2014

Leap into ABUNDANCE!

Glass half empty or half full?

The age old question about mindset, and the power of positive thinking. Some people say it's nonsense - how's viewing the same thing differently going to help you fill the glass? Should I focus on what I have or don't have? How will this change?

There have been a lot of things on my mind of late...and I've written and rewritten this blog post at least 5 times over, but it feels like there's something stuck. My Silwood Genius once said that worrying is like sitting on a rocking chair, and rocking yourself back and forth. It gets you nowhere, but it gives you something to do.

So what have I been up to since the last post?

I handed my resignation a month ago (shock! surprise!)... and as much as I believed that I was taking the right step to my dreams, I started to have mild panic attacks. It was nice to have a dream in the far distance - something crazy like building a school in 10 years' time to bridge the gap between school and work - it sounds so glorious and inspiring...But it's far from nice when you have the sudden realisation that the vision you had in your mind was not as clear as you thought you had. Your stomach sinks.

Do I really want to do this? Will it even work? I'm not ready, I thought. I'm still too young. I only just qualified as a Chartered Accountant this year, without commercial experience. I want to do personal development, and make a difference...but I don't have any relevant experience, or qualifications or backing. I want to make a difference in people's lives, but will I even be able to find an audience who will pay me for my services? I also need to be able to feed myself before I can be charitable. I wanted a break. I wanted to run away. I wanted to hide. I wanted to just pretend like nothing has changed. I wanted to see if there were other alternatives I could look into, to find some financial freedom and focus without stress on my passion....this...was me rocking in the rocking chair. Rocking back and forth. Back and forth. I don't have. I still need so much more. Who am I to speak to small businesses when I don't even have one yet? I wanted to motivate others to build and be great...and I couldn't do that for myself. *poof!*invisibility cloak on*...

Nope...it didn't work. I am still here.

I thought about how people tell their tales on stage when they're successful. The befores and afters. How they went from poor, broke, bankrupt, in debt...and then they were so hungry for success that they focused, they worked hard, they let everything go for their dreams... and now they're super rich and successful, and they're here to help you. Les Brown, Brendon Burchard, Robert Kiyosaki, Chris Gardner...the list goes on...

And then I remembered something in my sessions of self-pity - something that I should have remembered from Brendon Burchard and Robin Banks. Brendon didn't have much growing up, but he lived in total abundance until it was physically true. Robin Banks tells of John Kehoe's focus on abundance in his time of physical lack...He walked around, and appreciated everything he had, and now he has even more than you can imagine.

Yes, it's a different perspective. I learnt at T. Harv Eker's Enlightened Warrior's Power: the mind solving the problem cannot be the same as the mind creating the problem. I need a different perspective.

If there's anything that you should learn from meeting my older sister, is that...unlike me, she naturally focuses on what she has, instead of what she doesn't. In so doing, she is one of the most resourceful people you will ever meet.  Tony Robbins once said: "It's not resources but resourcefulness that ultimately makes the difference." This is my older sister.

I was so focused on what I didn't have that I was dis-empowering myself. I was comparing myself to people who have already made it, and how much I needed to still grow. I was impatient, scared, doubtful - so doubtful about my dream, that I was stuck in the "how"  - how do i accomplish this dream - I was so focused on how little I had now to accomplish it now, that I didn't give myself space to think about what I did have.

"Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can." - Arthur Ashe

What do I have?

I have a solid qualification. I have a set of highly marketable skills in the industry. I have a passion about developing people. I love balance. I have support from friends and family. I know people. I have so many resources at my disposal, if I asked. All I had to do was pluck up some courage and ask! Open my mouth! What I can do now... is do research in what's out there in terms of the accounting space...and start figuring out how I can add value, and solve some real world problems.

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny compared to what lies within us" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Too many of us think about our inadequacies. But what we have, already, is enough to take us to the next step, to learn what we need to learn, and to grow in the areas we need to grow and allow us to meet the people we need to meet. If we do not grow ourselves, we cannot manage more. This is why people who win the lottery cannot retain it. So don't want more, until you grow more! It's okay to take one step back to take two steps forward consistently, but not two steps forward suddenly...and getting stuck there because you had not practised the skill of walking.

So I finally sat down to do my budget today. For the first time, I realised...that I actually have been wasting so much of my money, because I didn't have a goal, because I was trying to fill another void,.... because I thought I didn't have enough clothes! I also realised, that I was capable of saving when I had a goal. I have 3 months to live and make it work, until I'm completely hungry. People always complain about not earning enough money, and find a way to prove themselves right by making the money disappear...trust me, I'm no longer doing that anymore.

So I leaped! And today, was my first day of ...not emptiness, not unemployment but rather self-employment :)...and ABUNDANCE! It's okay that I don't know exactly where to place my foot for my next step, I'm just going to decide on my next step, and if that does not bear results, I will just readjust.

Let go of yesterday. Plan for tomorrow. But live for today!

Yours in Appreciation
Donna

Ps. Thank you to all my friends and family for all your support, and your faith in me. Without you, I would still would be floundering.

To my friends at the company with the four blue boxes.... Thank you for adding to me in a significant way. And YES! I will miss you :) and our interactions.

#Charlie's Angels #WhereIsCharlie #Mogatu #PIC #meangirls #A-Team #myPerson #JFK #live #fancy #loanshark #v2 # trustee


"When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." - Paulo Coelho












Sunday 6 July 2014

Finding your Strength

A couple weeks ago, at Ryan Pinnick's Meet Your Genius seminar, we did an exercise that was simple but quite profound. The lesson from the exercise was this:

If you focus all your strength on your goal or vision, it doesn't matter what challenges come at you, you will maintain your course. However, if you put all your focus on being strong, to overcome the forces/struggles/challenges coming towards you, more likely than not....you will buckle and fall.

It's quite ironic.

What I found in myself while doing the exercise, was that I had a mass of inner strength that I didn't realise was there. When I forgot about myself, and the internal dialogue I used to have when accomplishing a goal, and just focused on the target of my aim/beam...My body adjusted to what it needed to do, to accomplish what I needed to accomplish. However, when I focused on trying to "be strong", I accomplished the exact opposite, I found my weakness and buckled under pressure.

If the thought does not serve us, why do we keep telling ourselves to be strong? What does it even mean to be strong?

I suppose, when we tell ourselves that we need to be strong, our underlying assumption is that we are weak, or at least we're trying to fight off/overcome our weaknesses to be a strong person. It's kind of a weird thought, but did you ever see the heroes like Batman, Spiderman, Superman... saying to themselves, when they're trying to save the world: "Come on. Just be strong. You can do it."

I've been listening to a few people on this subject: Strength - what is it? And why we should focus on it, instead of our weaknesses?

Marcus Buckingham said that you shouldn't be working on your weaknesses, you should be working on your strengths. Weaknesses are not always the things that we are bad at, but are often are the things that drain us. Our strengths are things that stem from our talents, our personality, and leave us energized when we build on them constantly.

Blair Singer says that you should focus on your strengths. Because if you keep focusing on what's wrong with yourself, your self concept will be smaller, your self esteem will be low, and your results will always be small. If you focus on your strengths, if you focus on what makes you alive, if you focus on what you're good at, your self concept grows, your self esteem grows and your results also grow.

All too often, we get sucked into our weaknesses. We beat ourselves up about why we didn't do things better. We feel sad that we're not as good as the person we work with. At performance evaluations, we have a list of "developmental areas" that we need to work on. What you FOCUS on EXPANDS (T. Harv Eker). When you start digging the well of weaknesses, you will find a bigger river from whence it comes, and soon you will start feeling lost, little, useless, inadequate despite whatever you've accomplished. We drown ourselves in negative self talk, at the detriment to all the joy that surrounds us. Trust me, I've been there.

A key thing to remember is that not everyone is built the same. Your weakness, may be someone else's strength and vice versa. Not everyone in a soccer team plays the same position, for the same reason that each team member serves a different function, and plays unique role in the team. Each member brings a different set of skills and strengths to make them a powerful team.

I believe that when you're doing something that lights you up, something that you are good at, you will be motivated to keep getting better at it, and achieve your vision. If your fight is with your weaknesses, you will always find more, and you will always lose. If your fight is one, that focuses on an inspired vision, you will ignite the strength within yourself, that no weakness can smother.


Albert Einstein said it best, when he said: "Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid."

Every one has different strengths and talents. It's time to focus on using what you're good at, what you love, to get to where you want to be, to who you want to be.

Yours in Inspiration
Donna

Ps. Thanks JFK for this amazing vid ;). Because sharing is caring! Enjoy! http://youtu.be/PBgqWAbyfsY

Tuesday 17 June 2014

Living Quickly

Mugatu and me, lol'd and rofl'd as he showed the Cyanide and Happiness comic to me today. I suppose when you're doing something that makes you unhappy everyday, being around people that pull you down, doing work that drains you...you will feel disempowered, dying...instead of being liberated and alive. The same goes for pursuing the quick things to patch up the gaping hole inside or distract yourself to numb the pain welling up. No matter how much you psyche yourself up, lie to yourself, that hole is not going to be fixed with a plaster.

The question you need to ask yourself is this: is this what I need to do to get to where I want to be?

A directionless life is a very hard life, as you struggle in the morning to find your reason for leaving your place of comfort. This un-lived life slowly starts eating away at you also as you drift through days that look the same. It is your living duty to find meaning and joy in the life that you've been given. In the breath that grants you life.

God grant me strength and wisdom and courage, to allow me to pursue the dream that has started to reveal itself piece by piece. 

"Whereever your heart is, there you will find your treasure." - Paulo Coehlo, The Alchemist

Thank you to my little Silwood Genius for the touching message you sent to me earlier. It's exactly what I needed. Me enabling you in your dreams is hope for me. Know, that in whatever you do...your pursuit of your dream has inspired me in so many ways. You're my little brother. And I am, and always will be, so proud of you. :)

"It's always impossible, until it's done." - Nelson Mandela

I am alive. I just "fricken" do it.(T.Harv Eker)

Yours in contemplation
Donna



Sunday 15 June 2014

Happy Father's Day

I'm ALIVE! 


May your Father's Day be one of appreciation of your roots, and the person who's loved you, protected you and guided you to be the person you are today. 


I believe I speak for my sisters as well, when I say:


Thank you for always making me feel like the most important, the most beautiful, the most treasured person in the world. :)


Best DADDY IN THE WORLD!


"Ba ba, WO AI NI. Fu chin jie kuai leh."

"爸爸, 我愛你。 父親節快樂!"

Monday 9 June 2014

Look Up!

Oprah once said that when you think you've learned a lesson, the Universe will test you.

I've been wondering what the lesson is that I was supposed to learn in the last month. It's been very frustrating, and I keep asking myself a lot of questions...I don't think all of them are relevant to my situation. Some, when asked, make me feel powerless, demotivated and downright trapped. As dramatic as it sounds, I was so distressed that I felt like I was dying inside. I didn't have time to do the things that I was passionate about anymore, and the thing that I thought I was passionate about...turned out to be something that was draining me. I would reach the end of the day, frustrated. I would pass out on my bed, and dread the next day. It's unbecoming, considering how far I've come. Was I prepared to do what was hard so that my life would be easy? (T. Harv Eker)

I still don't know what the lesson is. I have just observed one thing...that when I become really busy, I throw everything out the window. In the "Pursuit of Happyness", I throw out my health, the things and the people I love...All the things that are important to me.

I promised myself after my health scare at the end of last year...that I would look after myself. And here I was, perpetuating the cycle. I could hear my mom's voice in my head. I suppose dreams will still be dreams if I don't have the health to pursue them...

I need to put myself first. My health first.

I was reading the THE ALCHEMIST (by Paulo Coelho) last night, and I came across the The story of the Two Drops of Oil:

A merchant sent his son to learn the Secret of Happiness from the wisest of men. The young man wandered through the desert for forty days until he reached a beautiful castle at the top of a mountain. There lived the sage that the young man was looking for.
However, instead of finding a holy man, our hero entered a room and saw a great deal of activity; merchants coming and going, people chatting in the corners, a small orchestra playing sweet melodies, and there was a table laden with the most delectable dishes of that part of the world.
The wise man talked to everybody, and the young man had to wait for two hours until it was time for his audience.
The Sage listened attentively to the reason for the boy’s visit, but told him that at that moment he did not have the time to explain to him the Secret of Happiness.
He suggested that the young man take a stroll around his palace and come back in two hours’ time.
“However, I want to ask you a favor,” he added, handling the boy a teaspoon, in which he poured two drops of oil. “While you walk, carry this spoon and don’t let the oil spill.”
The young man began to climb up and down the palace staircases, always keeping his eyes fixed on the spoon. At the end of two hours he returned to the presence of the wise man.
“So,” asked the sage, “did you see the Persian tapestries hanging in my dining room? Did you see the garden that the Master of Gardeners took ten years to create? Did you notice the beautiful parchments in my library?”
Embarrassed, the young man confessed that he had seen nothing. His only concern was not to spill the drops of oil that the wise man had entrusted to him.
“So, go back and see the wonders of my world,” said the wise man. “You can’t trust a man if you don’t know his house.”
Now more at ease, the young man took the spoon and strolled again through the palace, this time paying attention to all the works of art that hung from the ceiling and walls.He saw the gardens, the mountains all around the palace, the delicacy of the flowers, the taste with which each work of art was placed in its niche. Returning to the sage, he reported in detail all that he had seen.
“But where are the two drops of oil that I entrusted to you?” asked the sage.
Looking down at the spoon, the young man realized that he had spilled the oil.
“Well, that is the only advice I have to give you,” said the sage of sages.
“The Secret of Happiness lies in looking at all the wonders of the world and never forgetting the two drops of oil in the spoon.”

My new found friend, JFK once told me...as I was balancing my full cup of tea while walking to my desk, to look up and look forward, while walking with a full cup. As ironic as it sounds, he said that's what keeps you from spilling. It was true. The more I stared and focused on my cup, the slower I walked, and the more the tea wobbled in my cup.

It was this ironic situation that found me a friend in the Trustee. (Yes, overfilling my cup seems to be my problem.) "So where's my cup of tea?" he laughed later...as I walked to my desk unaware of my surroundings. Yup.

It's time to look up, Donna Chiang. Balance and joy is not found burying yourself in the sorrows of your heavy footsteps. It is not found in the cup when look down into the watery mystery and by ignoring the world around you. Balance is found when looking up. And progress lies while looking forward, even though you may not know yet where your path will take you. And joy is found in the gratitude of being alive, and appreciating the ones around you and what you have.

In my times of confusion and mild anxiety curbing on depression...I'd like to impart this:

I have really amazing people in my life. Somehow, without asking, the friends and family have found me when I didn't have the courage to ask for help. When I look up, I see YOU smiling back at me, and that has made all the difference.

THANK YOU for being in my life.

Chin Up!
Walking forward!
Looking Up!

Yours..in appreciation
Donna



Friday 23 May 2014

Always choose...

Happiness is a choice! Always.

If you are happy or unhappy, you chose to be that. The same applies to the people in your life, the situation you're in, the work that you do, the habits that you have. You chose them.

You say: " I don't have a choice."

How can you say that I have a choice when I actually don't? My boss told me to finish this by tomorrow and that's why I'm still at work. I don't have a choice. I am always late because that is just who I am. I don't have a choice. I have to do this work even though I hate it because I have to pay the bills. I don't have a choice. I have to go to my friends party even though I don't know anyone. I don't have a choice. I couldn't fulfill on my promise because I didn't have enough time - because of my horrible boss - because I can't anymore - because life happens to me all the time... Poor me. I don't have a choice. 

I don't have a choice. I don't have a choice... I. don't. have. a choice!

Could you take anymore power away from yourself?!? 

Good grief!

Man up!

You were born a winner. (Yes, because you won the swim to the egg, and you became the Zygote to be the person you are.) Why do you choose to act like a loser??

If someone treats you a certain way, it was because at some stage you taught them how to. If you are somebody else's punching bag because they can't look at themselves in the mirror, you allowed that to happen.

The moment you choose to stop taking SH*T (mind my language, I'm getting passionate. Cos I protect and defend the people I love). The moment you STOP IT, is the moment you liberate yourself.

Freedom is always a choice.

Choose to be happy. Choose the solution instead of the problem. Choose to be better, and in so doing, surround yourself with people who want the same. 

Choose to distance yourself from people who do not support you and your dreams. The people who play victims in their lives, I love them and respect them, and do not hold anything against them...But if they try to project their victim status onto me so I can be a victim too like them, and feel sorry for myself...I'm sorry. No! Enough! I don't have so much time to feel sorry for myself all the time! Victims, don't realise that they're slowly chipping at you to bring down your self value, so they don't need to be more. So I'm not saying don't be friends with them. If you are friends with them...all I say is love and respect. But that is it! Do NOT CHOOSE TO BE A VICTIM if you enjoy freedom.

Choose successful habits, because you deserve all the success in the world. Choose to be alive, because tomorrow may never come.

Choose wisely, because the times are uncertain.

May the choice be yours. May you be accountable for the things you choose and do not choose. If you have made a bad choice, it's okay. We live and we learn. As Blair Singer says, WHAT CAN WE LEARN FROM IT? Learn the lesson and move on. 

Be mindful to not make the same choices if you aren't willing to live with the outcome. Choices can become habits too.

May your choices liberate you and give you eternal happiness. "Happiness is the truth" (Pharrell Williams) and being positive in any situation will open the door to your success. Happiness is not being on an island and nothing happening to you. Happiness is being in any situation, overcoming it and still being happy, positive, liberated.

May freedom and happiness be yours 

Yours in freedom 
Donna





Wednesday 21 May 2014

The Answer

The answer is never out there.


Alan Cohen once said that we were born FINE, until we were DE-FINED by society. 


The answer? Where is it?


It is inside waiting for you when you silence the noise around you, when you humble yourself to listen, when you cast aside self doubt, when you are willing to believe... Greatness is in you, because we were all born with greatness. 


Our duty is to DISCOVER our inner greatness, by DIS-covering or uncovering the world's crap that's been piled onto us. Thanks Jack Canfield for that insight.


Be kind to yourself. Self discovery and growth is not always the easiest process. Cast aside your pride - if you need to take a step back to take two steps forward. Do it. And if you cannot see....ask someone who cares about you to give you advice, because they will give you advice that's best for you, NOT THEM. 


Thank you to my Person, My Trustee, Si-Fu, and Rod for letting me dump some of mine to help me to get a little bit of clarity!


Enough! Wipe away those tears. Get up!


BELIEVE Donna Chiang, BELIEVE. 


Have patience, have faith, have hope!


I believe in myself.


Yours in Belief

Donna





Sunday 4 May 2014

Celebrating life

I came across something amusing and ...amazing today...and I felt I should share it. But before I do...I need to ask a few questions...

When last did you celebrate the day of your birth? If you don't, why? And when you do, how do you celebrate it?

It was a bit of a curious question I asked myself and my friends around me at the time. 

I smiled when Mogatu, my dear friend, told me of his idea. What an amazing idea I thought. I loved it! And he could see that I loved it. I have a feeling I'm more excited about his birthday than him about his own...lol! Not every day do you get to celebrate your 5th birthday, and there are very few chances in life when you get a re-do.

No, he's not turning 5 and this is not a re-do;). This is him enjoying and celebrating his life. But even if he did, how awesome would a 5-year-old birthday party be?

Him and I agree on something very fundamental. Why celebrate anything, if it's not worth celebrating? 

Most people celebrate birthdays now because it is what society dictates. Every year your friends expect you to host a birthday, and when you're young your parents arrange a party and cake AND you get presents. Yay! That's when you're young. It was different in my situation, but more on that later. 

So...when you're old, however, birthdays become more of a chore, admin and logistics...who do you invite, will they be offended, why do I have to spend money to celebrate my birth, is it really necessary? And the gifts...is it necessary? How much? What will they think of me? Is it what they want? What if they don't like it? Do I really need to get them a gift? Can I afford a gift at every birthday this year...I have a lot of friends!!

My parents have and will always be very practical people. We come from a very humble background, and we've all worked hard for the things we believed in, and God has blessed us in most of our endeavors. Birthdays have just never really been something my parents celebrate...I don't harbor any regrets. I've never truly wondered why because I've never truly believed in celebrating myself. It's kind of an odd thing to say...but anyways...

As I've gotten older, I've started to use my birthdays as an excuse to see all my friends...because honestly, I hate the attention. For some odd reason, I just feel the birthday girl/boy has so much pressure to be happy on the day because they were born...why? If I'm having a bad year, why on earth would I plaster on a smile to see people and pretend to be happy when I'm not? That's the one side of it...and...My family was never into the culture of birthdays and celebrating or doing unnecessary things. The only birthday party I've ever had...was when I turned 25. It was awesome, and it was an awesome year! There've been 3 times in between when a good friend and my sister got involved in getting a cake and a few people together. But I abhor the admin, and the attention.

But today I realized something...and this builds on the conversation I had with my friend, Mogatu. You've got to celebrate success...in whatever big way or small. You've conquered the biggest and the most difficult years, and you've made it out alive. We still are in tact, and we still have each other. If you don't celebrate the victories and the successes you want, you will never anchor them as happy experiences, you will never appreciate them and you will absolutely never have more of what you don't appreciate.

If your birthday is at the beginning of the year, set the tone for an amazing year ahead! And be happy to be alive! If your birthday is at the end of the year, celebrate an amazing year you've had because you're still alive and kicking! Lol.

Yes, this is going to be an amazing year, Mogatu! And for me :). We have amazing people in our lives! Yes or yes?

So... we may not be able to take full credit of us being born...but every year is a reminder, that without the people in our lives...you may not exist and you may not be the person you are today. 

Birthday celebrations? Are they compulsory...no. If they are, you deny yourself of the true meaning of the word birth. It was a day you were given life. Live your life. Be the best you can be. And celebrate! Celebrate all the life you've been given and the life you were meant to live!

Okay...before I give you away the short video clip... I have to thank someone. Thank you Mogatu for that insightful conversation :). I am blessed to have you in my life. I am planning my costume in my head lol...which one..I digress! Thank you for being the friend I need you to be. Hopefully I add as much value to your life too. 

For those of you who do not know who Mogatu is...don't worry about it. He is not evil, as much as his awesome laugh dictates. Mogatu comes from Zoolander, a movie we both love and quote from on a regular basis, and what a character he is! I've always wanted to mimic his laugh ...My Mogatu? When he laughs, it's so deep, it resounds with so much power, that you yourself want to also laugh. That's true happiness. True laughter and happiness amongst friends. Sharing the deep and the silly and being okay to still be friends :). 

So...as promised, the video link: thank you Mr Project Life Mastery for inspiring me, even on your birthday. We definitely need more people like you!


Yours in Living
Donna

PS. On Gifts? Honestly...it's the thought that counts. If you've rushed and you've overextended yourself to please me, it does not please me. I appreciate it when you find joy in giving me something. If it pains you, it pains me too. By the way, I find immense joy in gifting! Yes! It's strange...I know ;). I've slacked in this regard since my move to Johannesburg, but it's gonna change ;). 

PPS...
1000 views! I've just passed that mark!  From the bottom of my heart, thank you to each and everyone of you for supporting my blog! It's been amazing having readers from all over the world, and feedback! I'm still getting back to you if you've written to me ;), I just don't wanna do a half hearted job. I haven't forgotten. I promise. If I don't get back to you before I see you, I will see you before I write back to you. You know who you are ;). Hehe...and yes, I WILL see you, when I visit.

My blog started off as a reminder to myself about why I needed to be successful...until that died and revived as a way to release my thoughts to enable me to finally sleep...but it's turned into something that I really enjoy, and something other people enjoy reading, as I've been told. So yes, my friends ... Even though I have again mastered the art of sleeping, I will continue to write for you. If it makes a difference in your life, please continue reading...because it makes a difference in my life when I am able to inspire others to live a better life :). 

Saturday 3 May 2014

Chasing Rainbows

It has taken me a long time to think through what I want to say with this blog post. Today, I’ve finally found the words…let’s hope I get the direction right. So here goes! *winks*

Donna, Donna Chiang…

  1. 1.     Who are you?
  2. 2.     Where am I?
  3. 3.     Why are you here?
  4. 4.     What are you doing?
  5. 5.     When are you going to realise you?
  6. 6.     How…


People who’ve known me all my life, or more than a day…have started to notice a change. Most people think I’ve lost my marbles, and don’t quite understand what I’m up to. I am most amused when I watch my family scrambling around trying to understand if I need some help – not that I do what I do intentionally. It’s just been so hard to hide my excitement!  In my excitement, my mom has fed me so much fish, in the hopes that I will find my lost brain cells. My mom is the cutest…and my biggest blessing…and this is where I shall start…

1.     Who am I?

This is the universal question. We ponder all our lives, in search of an identity that would provide us meaning and joy – an identity that will give us purpose and direction – an identity that is socially acceptable – that speaks of a person that may achieve some level of success.

We mimic someone else, because it is easier to define ourselves by someone else who has established themselves. We “fake it ‘til we make it”. And for some odd reason, if we don’t make it…do we stop faking it? And if we “make it”, do we have the courage to unveil our true selves? Do we even still remember who we really are by then?

I am re-reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, and he is a firm believer of this idea: That the thing, the answer we’ve been looking for our lives, lies within us. We just need to be willing to look inside. I am a believer too. Children are born knowing, and through time, society teaches them that they no longer know - who they are and who they really want to be.

World, I have a message for you:

Open your eyes! Open your ears! Open your heart! When you are lost, remember where you came from. When you appreciate the value of your roots, that’s when you build the foundation of who you are. You cannot build a foundation without recognizing your past. You can choose to discard it, or add to it, but if you bury your past…as they say, the past will come to bite you.

2.     Where am I?

If you don’t appreciate where you are, or where you come from, you will never appreciate where you are going. The grass is never greener on the other side. If you’re always chasing fulfilment in the hands of others...my friend, you will be sorely disappointed.

The power lies in you. The here, the now. The grass is greener here, if you choose to water it!
3.     Why am I here?

Most children at a certain age, will discover the power of the question: WHY? And they will carry on like an annoying seagull, until the parents have run out of steam.

Mark Twain once said:

“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born, and the day you find out why.”
When you’ve realised your WHY, your PURPOSE…EVERYTHING falls into place. YOUR WHY should be the reason that wakes you up in the morning, brings a smile to your face, makes you want to be better, makes you want to work harder, gives you happiness, gives you fulfilment, and gives you a very important identity and direction.

4.     WHAT am I doing?

I don’t really know half the time, until I have realised that I’ve wasted a lot of time doing the wrong thing, or re-doing something because I didn’t understand what I was doing at the time. It’s okay not to always know what you’re doing, but it’s NEVER okay to JUST do something without thinking about the consequences first!
When act without thought, you potentially harm yourself and others. This is why we have brains, as My Helper says. We can replace a beating heart, but we can never replace someone’s brain. It is the seat of intelligence, use it! Use it or lose it! Your brain is not just a free tenant in your head!

When you’re doing something, remember to be present. There’s nothing worse when you’re engaged in an activity and you’re already thinking about something in the future, and stressing about how you should plan for it…or conversely, thinking about something in the past, and beating yourself up about something you should or shouldn’t have done.

The greatest gift you can give yourself is the gift of the present. That is why it is called the PRESENT!
5.     When am I going to put into action my purpose and plan, and manifest my results?

They say that the distance between your dreams and your results, is ACTION. It is true. When you don’t take an active step to do the things important to you, those things that you want…will always just be a wish. If you don’t act towards your dreams and what’s important to you, no one else will.

Take ownership of your life! It only takes 20 seconds of insane courage! And when you’ve started…my oh my…the rest will be behind you. Just keep the momentum going, keep swimming, keep rolling with the punches, keep running, keep being, keep hoping, until you run through the finish line.

There was a line in EAT PRAY LOVE that goes: There was a man who kept praying: “Lord, Lord, please let me win the Lotto.” This man kept praying like this for a few months, until the Lord spoke to him and said: “My son, please buy yourself a lotto ticket.”

If you’re not willing to help yourself, no one else will.
6.     How…do I get there? How do I do it?

We as a society keep focusing on the technical skills at the cost of the why. If you don’t have a purpose or a direction to your journey…you can be the best driver, the best sailor, the best pilot, the best athlete, but you will never get where you want to be…because you don’t know where you’re going. If you don’t know WHY you’re doing what you’re doing, you will give up when the going gets tough!

So be mindful of all the other questions before you embark on how. HOW is important, but not at the cost of the others. If you only focus on HOW do I get rich, HOW do I get financial freedom, HOW do I get an amazing body…without understanding why it’s important to you, your victories will be very short-lived, and be very meaningless.

Okay! So if you’re still wondering if this is all I wanted to say….after being so vague about myself…fear not, read further. I just wanted to get the important stuff out of the way first, before I get too personal. Brace yourselves!


Donna, Donna Chiang…

  1. 1.     Who are you?
  2. 2.     Where are you?
  3. 3.     Why are you here?
  4. 4.     What are you doing?
  5. 5.     When are you going to realise you?
  6. 6.     How…

Donna Donna…is a lady. She is someone who has learned to find her voice after struggling with her own insecurities for the longest time. She has learned to overcome. She has learnt to appreciate who is by understanding her roots. She is a Chartered Accountant. She works very hard for what she believes in. She is honest, sometimes forgetful. She sees beauty. She sees the best in people. She…is passionate about success, about inspiring herself and the people around her…even more so is her compassion for others! Her passion to make a difference, and live a meaningful and fulfilled life! She…is a child of God. And hopes that she will magnify His will, in her life. She thinks before she acts. She always acts with integrity.

Donna is proudly South African, and an ambassador of the world! She lives in Johannesburg, the City of Gold…the city that is the melting pot of all cultures. The city that is the gateway to the rest of Africa. The hub of African Trade. She is in the centre of the world, watching…as the world enters…and she prepares for her moment…by appreciating her roots, her past, her present, her future paths and plans.

Why is she here? She is here to help the hopeless youth of South Africa. The ticking timebomb. She is here to help others who need someone to believe in them, before they believe in themselves. She is here to be happy, and in so doing, create happiness for others. Rainbows. She encourages, she heals. She is here to magnify the power within her, created by God, and in so doing, give others permission to do the same. She is here to create a better life for all….She is here to inspire others to be better, and most of all…to inspire herself, to live the best life she can live.

What is she doing? Sometimes she doesn’t know. What she does know…is that wherever she goes, whomever she meets, she strives to always add value! *winks* and a *smile*!

When is she going to start her master plan of realising her WHY? The time is NOW. In whatever big way or small, she takes a step to her ultimate dream. Her dream of uniting people to their dreams, of uniting people to their talents, uniting people to their voices, uniting people to their purpose, uniting people to each other!

How….well, that doesn’t matter so much for now, does it? If it matters to you…visit the links below. I recommend starting with Success Resources, going to T. Harv to get you thinking like a rich man, and Blair Singer and Roger Hamilton to pull out your talents, Harv and his team will set you up with the other technical know hows ;).

Before I end off this really long post, I’d like to take a moment to thank the people who have added so much to my journey. You will see more of them on my later posts…but for now, I just want to appreciate you:

My Si-Fu. My Centre. My Jack Frost. My Oracle. My New Best friend (who is no longer on probation – yes! You’re permanent now ;).

My Angels. We’ve decided to call each other Charlie’s Angels. There’s 3, and we’re awaiting the return of Angel #1, and Charlie.

My Partner in Crime. Mogatu. Spiderman. The Trustee. My Person. My Zen Custodian.

My Impi’s! For giving me Warrior cred!

My Counsellor. My Helper. My Happy Church family.

My Dads – My Rich Dad, Spiritual Dad, Wise Dad.

My Big Bros – I know you will bounce off any guy who shouldn’t be around…aherm! *winks*

My Sisters – for always being the wind beneath my wings.

My Dad – For always believing in me, and always having the patience to let me be who I need to be. For having the heart for others. For always giving of yourself.

My Mom – For sacrificing everything for me. You are the greatest woman I will ever know. Your love and your perseverance knows no bounds. You are my best role model. You may not know it yet, but you are wiser than what society recognizes. Mom, thank you for always grounding me, when I find myself floating.

My Mentees. The rest of my family and friends whom I've yet to find names for…:)…for always inspiring me to be better for you.

Thank you for being in my life. For being you. For accepting me for me. Without you, my little village of support, I would lose myself to the darkest holes of doubt and fear and sorrow.

Last but not least….Veronica and Richard Tan from Success Resources, T. Harv Eker and his amazing team, Blair Singer, Dr Rohan Weerisinghe, Ryan Pinnick, Roger Hamilton, Robert Kiyosaki, Les Brown, Clem Sunter…you have added so much to my life. In ways you can’t even begin to describe! I guess…all that waits…is what fruits I produce, with my strengthened roots ;).

In true, T.Harv Eker Style…. “We’ll see!” *winks*

LOVE LOVE LOVE!

Donna Chiang

“Aqua Diva”









Wednesday 30 April 2014

The Walls of Jericho...oh oh...

This is my new JAM!! Proudly South African! It has a bit of a beat, and inspiration.

My take away from this song:

1. If you persist, any walls will come down for you, when you pursue your purpose and your dreams. This is the story of Jericho. If you didn't know...it comes from the Bible. I know right? Pretty cool.
2. Some walls are not there to stop you, but to test how badly you want something...and how far you're willing to go to reach your dream.
3. South Africans really make me proud to be one! Well done Pascal & Pearce! *airpunch* YES!

Enjoy!
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Click here for YouTube Link
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Pascal & Pearce feat. Jimmy Nevis - Jericho

Source of Lyrics - edited

I'm tired of the same thing
Gotta just get it 
To get some
I keep my head spinning
Hands to the ceiling
Just for fun


But something changed
Babe you're the one to blame
Felt like you are my rainbow after the rain
Oh, I never ever ever thought I'd feel this way


And you came right in now down these walls of Jericho
I didn't know you the one that I was looking for
I tried to break through but these reasons wouldn't let me go
But you came right in now down these walls of Jericho


I'm tired of the same thing
Gotta just get it
To get some
I keep my head spinning
Hands to the ceiling
Just for fun


But something changed
Babe you're the one to blame
Felt like you are my rainbow after the rain
Oh, I never ever ever thought I'd feel this way


And you came right in now down these walls of Jericho
I didn't know you the one that I was looking for
I tried to break through but these reasons wouldn't let me go
But you came right in now down these walls of Jericho


You came right in and I downed these walls of Jericho