Big Rocks and Strong Foundations

Someone once said, and I dono if I’m paraphrasing a lil:

The difference between a successful person, and a not-so-successful person is the clarity of the goal, and committing to the action, to see the results. The unsuccessful don’t have goals to account for and therefore they don’t commit to appreciating and analysing their results. If you cannot manage your success, you cannot manage your wealth…by the same token, if you never take action …life will always happen to you. And You will NEVER have accountability for the things you do.

There were a number of discussions happening today, most of them were in my head.

When I was cleaning out my closet, I realised I had the same kind of clothing for always. I kept buying more, because I didn’t rmb I had other unworn clothes. I kept looking outward for fulfilment than inward for contentment and gain. Before you seek greatness in the outside world, succeed in the smallness of the inside world – perhaps that’s how you expand your circle of influence, as 7 Habits of Highly Successful Human Beings by Stephen Covey suggests. Use it, or lose it, you know? That’s what Blair said in his training.

If you can’t appreciate what you have now, what makes you think you will ever appreciate what you have later. What you don’t appreciate will always leave you. If you don’t appreciate yourself, your family, your friends, your health, your wealth, your happiness…in some way or other…they will leave you. And if you try and put the blame on someone else for your problems, you empower the problem and disempower yourself and your solution. That’s the difference between a problem solver and a problem maker/victim. That’s the difference between the successful and the not-so-successful.

When you set up your goals, you need to have clarity on EXACTLY you want to achieve. If you don’t have a clear goal in mind, you won’t be able to effectively monitor the results of your actions/inactions. Have a GAME plan! and have someone hold you accountable if you aren’t able to do that your self. CLARITY is SOOOOO important. If your intentions aren’t clear, the manifestations of your results will be very slow…confusing…noisy…and you will be swimming in the sea of doubt and frustrations. T. Harv. Eker promotes the idea of clarity. And I see its importance now.

Just as an aside tho…when you’re measuring yourself, don’t be too hard on yourself, otherwise you can’t keep moving…and trying to achieve success. It’s not about beating yourself up about how useless you are and how unhappy you are anymore. It comes a time, when you need to teach yourself how to be an overcomer of challenges and problems…appreciate the problem!!! Because if you cannot dispel the myth/stigma/the hopelessness around it, you cannot even begin to change.

As the serenity prayer goes:

God grant me the serenity 
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

The key is to be not to always hard on yourself if you’re hurting. Let the feeling be, and soon enough you will learn to accept it and move on. Awareness is the first step to change. I believe it. If you wanna be a better person, be happier, a contributor to society, you need to begin taking the steps to make that happen. Walk the TALK!!! Talkers and no WALKERS…they soon become a trademark for empty promises. They’re the friends, you can’t really always rely on. That’s why you need to lead by example. How do you expect others to follow, if you don’t believe in your own path and walking too…?

“Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”

-         Albert Camus

If you don’t keep walking…you may lose the friend who’s trying to walk towards a better future. A better life. When your friend gets there, they definitely could use a friend.

A sorrow shared is half a sorrow, a joy shared is twice a joy. - Unknown

Hopefully, you find each other’s rhythm. Recognise and appreciate the other person’s strengths and weaknesses, and help support or celebrate them. It really starts with you. If you don’t change, how can you expect other people to change.

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Albert Einstein

I commit to changing my habits, and improving me to be the best that I can be…getting better and better.

What I wanted to also say was this…You also need to spend some time cleaning through your clothes, your haves and have nots, your problems and solutions, your friends your foes…if you don’t go through the process of the springclean…you miss the opportunity of learning to grow, and rmb what you can still improve on. No one is perfect…and everyone has everything to gain from revisiting this exercise.

Also…when you clean out your things…and you see something sentimental, or you are cleaning out your feelings…and a negative thought starts occurring you need to be aware of yourself, and SNAP! Out of it. If you don’t, you will keep dwelling in the past.

Ryan Hogarth once said at a talk: and I am paraphrasing…

-         If you keep focusing on the rearview mirror(the past), you cannot focus on the future.

By losing focus on what is to come, you’re so focused on the emptyiness in the past, and what you don’t want…and you can’t clarify what you want. Until such time that you clarify your intentions…you and the universe cannot match up each others needs. You will attract a lot of noise in your life….the wants and want nots. If you are not clear from the get go about what you want, and you keep saying you don’t want this you don’t want that…it will come to a point where you no longer want anyone in your life cos everyone has disappointed you. Are you a perfect person? Can you honestly say that everyone who’s met you can appreciate everything about you? Every person…knows that theres nothing more changeable than weather…and human beings. We learn and grow. The only constant is GOD! Please remember that!

Every time you point at someone to tell them about their faults, just remember that 3 fingers point back at you. You need to do a little bit of self-examination before you can start picking out at someone else’s faults. TRUTH!

"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? Matthew 7:3

Please reserve judgement, if at all possible. Judging someone, speaks more about the person judging than the person being judged. Judging closes your mind to any kind of person you wanna meet. Instead of judging…try next time to ask the question: why do you say that? Why do you think that? That would be more effective to help the person, than point fingers and ask the person to reflect…when you, who is not perfect, need so much more improvement?

Have you changed anyone lately? Have anyone of you had someone else try to change someone? As Blair asked one day….(what a genius). Nobody likes it. Don’t judge. Yourself or other people – instead of judging, you should try and use the platform to make a better decision. If you wanna change, change yourself first. Small wins! When the observer sees the joy in what you are doing…magic will happen, and you will inspire their change. The key is to grow and change yourself first!

Another point I wanted to mention is this:

Charity begins at home.

If you cannot learn to appreciate yourself and be kind to yourself, how do you teach others to do the same thing? Being happy, progressive, successful are all skills that you need to appreciate the importance of.

Everyone is amazing!

“Everybody is a Genius. But If You Judge a Fish by Its Ability to Climb a Tree, It Will Live Its Whole Life Believing that It is Stupid.” - Albert Einstein

Stop bashing your head against the wall….Your spirit is fragile….just rmb to be committed to improve, find people to help you along the way.

Team work is important…you can never grow big until you learn the art of delegation, trusting others to leverage your power and business…obviously it has to be a meaningful business if it has any chance of surviving..

Thank you to my Master Mind team for being the great people you are, and inspiring me and motivating me to obtain clarity. For holding myself accountable and….to push each other to succeed together.

“If you want to go fast, walk alone.  If you want to go far, walk together”. – African proverb

As you walk…you will have people to laugh with, to help you recognise and celebrate who you are and what successes you’ve achieved…if you fall, there will ppl to catch you. But you all hold hands and support each other. Not sure if holding hands is appropriate…? Hm…or just be there for each other….

Oh! If you don’t appreciate the problem, you will never appreciate the magnitude of the solution. Rmb to appreciate both. The problem always provides you an opportunity to capitalise on a business idea. Also it, allows you to bring others closer to help you.

I didn’t understand this initially…but I started to….Paul in the Bible once said:

“Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12

Every person needs success…but the ones who sustain it are the ones who are grounded. Is your WHY strong enough to succeed in any situation? Is it able to allow you to overcome challenges…this is the world – there are always obstacles. The sooner you learn to overcome them, laugh about them if you wish, take away the mental block…the seriousness of it all, you start to let go the control of the problem. Don’t deny the problem, and don’t deny the help…cos you need it. By the same token, one day, you will be the one who will be in the position to help someone else.

Be clear with your WHY!!! Then the what when where how….all will soon come.

I feel like I have a strong WHY…now it’s to decide about WHAT.

Til next time…always…love yourself first! No matter what! Act inspite of everything in your life…your fear, your money, your ….i dono. Just aim to always be happy…be simple.

Have faith we will get there J

Love yourself, cos you were born special!!

Love Don J

Ps. Your foundation for your success needs to be a solid one! Hard rocks! Strong WHYs….ALWAYS